genet (enveri) wrote,

  • Mood:
Soo. Yeah. Played around with the new styles, so my journal has a new look. I am pleased. I'll probably noodle around with my website tonight if I can get to it (ahem) and play with it some too. I love our DSL, but the fact that I have to go through all sorts of contortions to look at the two sites hosted on fennec is... amazingly annoying.

BUT anyway. I've tried to draw a bit today and keep getting distracted. I'm in one of those horribly frustrating stages where nothing I do comes out looking write, and I'm experimenting with different styles... so it's all a nasty looking mishmash. Oh well. I'm sure I'll come out of it eventually. I've been kind of itchy to do something fun, but pencils don't interest me, and I haven't really felt like messing with Photoshop. Maybe I'll pull out an old piece and putz around with it.

I've been doing alot of thinking lately, too, about what I want to do with my life. I had originally planned to go back to school just to get my core classes out of the way and let Crosscom foot the bill, but it seems that I may only have a year to do it in, and... I don't think I'll be going back to school within the next year. I'm nearly debt free, but the stress levels are still high, and will be even higher as we consider moving to the Eastern Seaboard.

And then there's still the eternal question of 'What do I want to be when I grow up?' Most people have a good idea by the time they graduate, but.. I never have. A healthy dosage of reality showed me that most of my juvenile dreams wouldn't make the adult me very happy; and persuing those dreams would be a waste of time and money.

So... what do I want? I don't really know. Better to say what do I NOT want? I hate flipflopping around, some may have noticed that I am a very goal-oriented person. It bothers me that I don't have a life plan in place and in some stage of implementation.

So yeah. I've been working on a list of things I don't want to try and narrow it down to something a bit more general than 'something that makes money'.

- I do NOT want a job that requires long hours on the job on a regular basis. This pretty much rules out working in the medical industry (I was considering Vet tech for a long time). I don't want to work a 60-70 hour work week. 40 hours with the occasional overtime, thanks.

- I do NOT want to be in the service industry. 6 years of Customer Service is enough. I want out. I am tired of dealing with cranky people and trying to placate them with promises I can't keep.

- I do NOT want a position that requires on me being creative. Web design, art, ect. While such a job would be fun at first, art is very much a hobby for me, and relying on it for income would take all the enjoyment out of it. (At least, I think it would)

- I do NOT want a ticket that requires extensive travel. I used to want to be an archeologist as a kid, but then I realized that would require a lot of time away from home. This would be fine if I was single, but I'm not, and I like home-time.

- I DO want something that I can work at my own pace. My favorite job was one that I worked at my own pace, sat quietly at my desk, very few phone calls, and just... did my thing. If I needed to take a 5 minute break, I could.

- I DO want something challenging. Stuffing envelopes all day? Naaaah. I'll pass, thanks. Give me something that requires concentration, not something I can tune out and do in my sleep.

- I DO want a job I can leave at work. I'm all about deadlines, and stuff like that, but I want a job that if I do my job, I can leave it at work and not come home feeling stressed and exhausted.

- I DO want a job that gives me a 'net connection. Say what you will about surfing on company time- I am a more productive worker if I have something that I can relax with periodically. And who's the better worker? The employee that takes 2 minutes 4 times a day to read email, or the employee that takes 4 15 minute smoke breaks a day? I can live without the internet on the job, but I do want something that lets me take breaks to relax my brain.

- I DO want a desk job. Manual labor just isn't my thing.

So.. um yeah. I keep thinking something IT related may be the ticket.. which should be.. interesting. My math skills leave a lot to be desired, and programming and the like are very math heavy.

So.. here I am. I really want/need my education, and I don't want to put it off much longer. Maybe I can look into online studies...

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