genet (enveri) wrote,

  • Mood:

5 days...

5 days left to get through before long weekend. 5 days left until I have to spend a weekend alone. I'm both looking forward to it... and dreading it. I was kind of wanting to make this past weekend special.. but it just didn't work out that way.

Friday was uneventful, as far as work went. We had a few problems with RB, but I stayed out of it, quietly reminding my coworkers to make sure Judy knew. Around 6pm, she suddenly mutters something to KT, then left for 45 minutes, returning with her daughter. I hope she's gone soon.

Saturday, we slept in until around 8:30.. which, for us, is sleeping in, yes. Lazed about a bit, in that sleepy phase where you aren't sure yet what you're doing that morning. I went off to Wal-Mart to pick up necessities and splurge a bit on myself. I splurged too much, unfortunately. I spent way too much money. That is something I need to be careful of. I bought a new pocketbook and planner, since my old planner had run out of pages and I couldn't find refills... and my old pocketbook wasn't big enough for all the junk I tried to carry in it. I also picked up some hand lotions ($1.50 per tube. I couldn't resist) and a few other girlie things. It was fun, but.. .yeah. I wish I hadn't done it.

About noon, we were joined by Panther and Wolfette, at which time we adjourned to the Chinese Buffet, devouring good buffet and mediocre Mongolian BBQ. As we were leaving, Aureth called, since he planned on coming up our way, and we made arrangements to meet him at our apartment an hour and a half later. We went home and popped in Robin Williams' HBO standup routine that was playing recently (we managed to tape all but the first few minutes)... and watched that until Aureth arrived. Feren hadn't seen all of it, and Jen hadn't seen it at all, so it was fun watching their reactions.

After Aureth arrived, we hopped into cars and went to the Buffalo Grove theatre to catch Insomnia. I'll post a review of the movie later, let me just say now that I liked it. A lot.

After the movie, we stopped back by our place to pick up a growler for Aureth, then scooted over to Mickey Finn's for dinner. Most of the crew wasn't really hungry, since we'd had a big lunch, Aureth hadn't eaten yet, and... I'm not sure what my problem was. Anyway.. We all got something - Jen had a salad, Feren and Roho split an appetizer sampler, Aureth had beef stew (that looked delicious), and I had the best burger I've ever put in my mouth. And everyone but Jen and I had beer.

After we were fed and watered, we wandered back to our apartment and popped in The Godfather. I suppose putting in a 3 hour movie at 10pm should have posed itself as a bad idea. But it didn’t at the time. Around 11:30, midnight I was drooping.. so Roho put me to bed, where I tossed and turned, and woke up every time someone laughed. Not a happy kitty, but I was glad that everyone had a good time, and my presence (or lack thereof) didn’t keep them from doing so.

I did have a bit of.. a bad night that night. I don’t know what’s been wrong with me lately... but the old.. anxiety, depression, whatever.. has been popping up at random times. Maybe it was because I slept poorly, I don’t know. I felt rejected when I had no reason to, and I’ve been rather.. over emotional all weekend.

Aureth had crashed at our place Saturday night. I have vague memories of telling Feren and Jen good night around 1:30am, but I don’t remember saying much.

Sunday morning we woke up... ate some breakfast, then while Zim was playing, I started cooking lunch. I was determined to make my grandmother’s shrimp stew. While we were doing our various morning activities, our new apartment complex called us to let us know they had a place for us, with the floorplan we wanted. Hurray! After shoveling stew down the guys’ throats (and giving Aureth one of the bowls of leftover gumbo I had in the freezer) we went over to Wheeling to talk to the new complex.

Our rent was about $30 more than we were expecting, but that was because we had selected a full sized washer and dryer rather than the smaller ones. We had several other questions resolved as well. We were thinking of going with a satallite TV, depending on how the cable packages in the area look. We’re both determined not to get something similar to what we have now, which is a lot of money for not a lot of channels. Fortunately, the complex allows this. :)

It looks like we’re going to be moving around the 14th of September, just over a month away. We discussed it, and did decide not to go with hiring someone to move us. That’s $400 that neither of us really needs to spend, and we’ve had a lot of people offer willing hands. The biggest problem will be getting the treadmill down, but I think they’ll find it easier to get downstairs than it was to get UP.

Aureth left from the complex office... he had followed us there in his car to see the new place. Our new apartment is ideally located- within walking distance of the office and a small shopping center. Nicely situated between the two exits of the complex, and DSL capable. We are very very pleased.

Sunday night... we didn’t do much. Watched the 6th Sense, which made me cry at points. Afterwards, we went to Blockbuster to return the video and snag this week’s movie. I chose Dr Doolittle 2 because I needed comedy, something that wouldn’t make me feel, or wouldn’t make me cry.

I thought that things were tense between Roho and myself... I guess it was paranoia. I thought he was disappointed with the way our evening went. My emotions have been on a downward spiral this weekend, I think. It’s been one of those times when I just want the world to stop so I can get off. As Bren was leaving this morning for work, I made a comment, and his reply.... it sounded like he was annoyed and angry... and.. it was all I could do to keep from crying.

I haven’t slept well for days... weeks... I identified rather well with the characters in Insomnia. It seems that I wake up 6 and 7 times in the night to go use the bathroom, and every morning, I wake up at 5am, and can’t go back to sleep. Small noises loom loud in my ears, and I just... can’t sleep. Usually I drop back off about 10 minutes before the alarm goes off at 6:30. After that, I can sometimes doze for another half hour.

I really don’t want to go in to work today. The thought of facing my workday in my current emotional state is daunting, to say the least. However, I know that right now there’s no one trained to do my job for the hours I’m doing it. And if I stay at home... I don’t want to worry Brendan. Besides that, I already took next Monday off from work. It would be bad form to say the least to call in today.

So I’m going in... and I’m taking a lunch, and I’m going to be strong today. Withstand temptation to get something more tasty (but less healthy) for my dinner, which is something I’ve really struggled with of late. I’m both looking forward to and dreading starting the Atkins induction next week. It’ll be nice to start shedding pounds, but... the restricted diet is going to be hard. Guess I’ll be eating a lot of eggs.

Anyway.. I believe I am going to go and try to nap... maybe that will help my headache, and help me to feel a bit better.

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